I'm sooo far ahead of you.
I'm the reason they sold out of sneakers. I got my Christmas shopping done early. (I kept the Trump socks for me.)
You are going to be so envious that I have the sneaker-smelling aroma emanating from my bod and your BO doesn't come close.
I'm the reason they had to change Trump's wealth estimate from 3,900,000,000 to 3,900,000,199.
Um... change that last estimate to 3,900,000,398. I couldn't risk running out.
