Domspeak Forums Discussions Lobby Dommes Who Come Out of Retirement

I love women. There is an eternal soft place in my heart for every special relationship I've had. When a Domme that I have seen many times over the years came out of retirement, I worked it into the travel schedule. She was older, which was to be expected but a lot heavier. There was no relaxing play area. It was an every day living room. Even that I could have gotten around but she did not want to be there anymore than I did. If she had just contacted me and asked for money, I probably would have helped her. This was pathetic for both of us. What do you when you know it is going to go bad? When it is someone you care about, walking out isn't an option. I am very hesitant to see anyone after it has been a long time after this. I've seen older Dommes before that were enthused and happy to see me. This was not the case. Suffering through a session in this kind of way is not what I envisioned.

Two points here, the first is Ted's comment, "I love women." With all the drama S&M and BDSM provides, any true sub really does love women to the point that they will do almost anything to be in their presence once again. I can identify with that remark. That's why some of us would like to find out what happened to them, or the old question, "Where are they now?" Sometimes you shouldn't find out.

On the bright side of a Mistress' retirement, I sessioned with Mistress Belle de Jour in the early '70s. She was my first. I was in my early 20s, she was in her late 40s. I left the scene originally after having three or four sessions/meeings with her, one as a house slave at her apartment and another was being used to train a neophyte Mistress with her. When I got back into the scene during the mid '80s I read she had a dungeon, I liked and trusted her, so we had one session. But after that she said she was married and was managing her dungeon, no sessions. (She made recommendations to me that were excellent, such as her niece, a blonde bombshell named Mistress Gloria, and as legendary as Belle, Mistress Ava Taurel.) By the mid '90s I was back into the scene, heard she was co-owning a dungeon, I called late one Saturday morning and heard her sexy, throaty old New York voice on the line. She remembered me. I told her I wanted to session with her. She said she was retired, had nothing to wear, etc., but by then I was no longer a timid 20-something I was in my 40s. She had to be 70 or so by then. I told Belle I'd be right over and convinced her to session with me. I wore my usual homemade Tarzan thong/g-string, and she entered the room wearing a black corset, leather slacks and black high heels. She circled me, pinched my nipples and slapped my rear end, saying, "You know, you've still got a great ass." It was a wonderful final session with a great and sexy legend.

On the other side of the coin was around the same time, the mid '90s, I made an appointment with a self-described "spankologist," Jacqueline Park, who I learned later was the mistress (romantic, not BDSM) of Hollywood mogul Jack Warner and Ronald Reagan. Again, in my 40s, I wanted to see a mature Mistress and she did sound seductive on the phone. (The print ad was a fuzzy pic from probably 25 or more years before.) That should have been a hint I should never have called, but... I was thinking with head between my legs and not the one above my shoulders. I went to her apartment. The furnishings of her place seemed to be from the 1960s or mid-70s with plenty of "old lady" antiques. As for Jackie, she was a petite old lady, in a silk robe with loads of makeup and dyed hair. It was sad. I briefly spoke to her, said I had to run, and left her tribute on the table. It was sad and disturbing, and turned me off from sessions for several months, almost a year.

I saw older legendary ladies twice. Booth were fantastic and very professional. Neither had retired. Maybe that is the difference. It sounds like you got suckered by someone desperate.

It is crummy you went through that and admirable that you were a gentleman about it.

It sounded like I did, but then I vaguely remember a thread on MF posting that they saw Jackie and stayed. For me it was a sad experience and I left quickly. Another red flag: Her tribute even for the '90s was minimal. Mistress Cheyenne, thanks for the compliment but as soon as I knocked on the door I felt I spent the money. That happened one other time when an independent Mistress that advertised in print and online, seemed to be a known entity, was high when I got there. Not retired and young, in her 30s. I said I couldn't stay and left quickly. Social media, websites and reviews - if you do your homework - do help today.

I'm in my 30's and think about coming out of retirement. It is unrealistic because of my new family and vanilla career path. It doesn't mean that I don't miss domming. Although what you experienced was unfair to you and understandably disappointing, there are those of us who love the femdom life.

Mistress I agree with you and understand the love of the femdom life. I’ve known my longtime Mistress for more than a few years who I session with, and she’s completely under-the-radar now, devoting most of her energy to her vanilla career. We never really discuss it but she has hinted she still sees one or two other longtime clients.

Mine was like the Jacqueline Park moment you describe. It is hit hard because she is someone I cared about. If she had asked I would have helped her and we could have had a nice lunch together, reminiscing about the good times we shared.

It was that she scammed me that hurt. I didn't care about the money. It was that she didn't have more respect for me and what I believed to be a true friendship. I still wish her the best.

For me, it isn't about age. One of the ladies I frequented worked into her mid sixties. She kept herself in pristine condition. She took on age and made it her own. She must have been well into her 60's when I last saw her. We went to the beach. Her body and the way she carried herself was more appealing than any younger woman there. If someone wants to let themselves go or is ill and can't help their decline, that is their business. I've got a host of imperfections myself. Hustling people who care about me isn't one of them. I do agree that a mature Domme brings a set of skills and class that usually only comes with experience.

"It isn't about age," because... it isn't. It is about experience, passion for the scene and being in shape to perform. My longtime Mistress is not my age (70), but has to be 60-ish. Yet she looks a hot 50. Really. She never really wears anything too revealing, yet the reactions she gets when I've driven her to run errands when she leaves or returns to the car by guys is something. As for me, I'm healthy for my age, but gained a few pounds over the years. I sometimes wonder as I look myself in the mirror, what a 20- or 30-something Mistress would say if I appeared at her dungeon. Maybe something like, "Thanks grandpa, I'll pass." LOL!