Years ago my wife and I went to her friend's second wedding. I only knew the bride and the groom. My wife knew them, a few of the bride's relatives and a couple of her close childhood friends. Unlike most wedding I had ever been to, the tables were small, six people. At our table one couple didn't show up but one of the bride's childhood friends did with her husband. My wife knew them both and handled the introductions. The wife was Italian American, looked like a 40-ish Annette Funicello... with an edge. Dark black hair, bright red lipstick and matching nail polish, dressed in a long black gown, with black lace covering her arms and ample breasts. She wore a gold Catholic cross that, of course, fell on top of her cleavage. Uncharacteristically I became lost for words and made an effort to make sure I spoke to her straight in the eye. Of course she sat next to me which made me a bit uncomfortable. LOL.
The husband, a few years older than her, was also Italian American. He had long gray hair in a pony tail, conventional suit and tie, but when we said hello and during dinner I noticed he had long fingernails and they were painted in different colors. She had her own business (I don't remember what) and was friendly but reserved. The husband seemed far more passive and I forgot what business he was in. My imagination went nuts. She had the look and demeanor of a top Dominatrix. And the husband? Definitely a sub vibe... maybe into cross dressing?
The drive home with my wife was fascinating. She joked that she was proud I wasn't staring at "Anniette's" breasts. She then said that the couple was then married for at least 25 years and they had three kids, two in college and one in high school. We both finally said, you can't judge a book by its cover. I brought up the kink angle and my wife said she never heard anything about that from her friend, the bride. And we both blurted out at the same time, if they're happily married, kids are doing well, who cares what they look like or if they are into kink behind closed doors?