Domspeak Forums Discussions Lobby When a Dom Retires

It has been interesting to see the Doms that retire and completely disassociate and others who love the life, never giving it up, right down to doing sessions in their sixties. For me, I watch it from the sidelines. I retired fairly young, walking away from a lot of money because my personal life was going in a different direction. Today, my life is centered around family. But, I still stay involved with people I know through femdom. Some of my former clients are among my closest friends. My younger Dom friends come to my house holidays and cook outs. I can't imagine walking away from my life and the people I came to love. Of course, it is different for everyone. But, I like to stay in touch and involved in discussions.

Mistress, based on your post, and what I have learned from some Mistresses I have known pretty well, you have successfully be able to keep your interest in the scene alive in your life very successfully. Others, like Belle de Jour of NYC, was active in the scene in her early 70s the last time we met, partnering in a couple of dungeons. And I've seen pics of Belle going to BDSM events in Manhattan in her 90s. Her niece Gloria, who became a Mistress for awhile, and daughter who was a receptionist, were part of her business in the 1980s so her family knew of her career.

My longtime under-the-radar Mistress, who's in her early 60s but looks a decade younger, still dabbles in sessions with me and I think a couple of other longtime regulars. But she no longer advertises for fear of jeopardizing her vanilla career. Similarly a Mistress I met in the '00s and knew for a decade was always private even when she posted on the old wb270.com female bodybuilder site & her own website, disguising or hiding her face in stills or self-produced videos due to her vanilla career. Eventually she retired, we kept in touch for a couple of years and we had dinner a couple of times, but eventually she formally said goodbye to me. She was too busy with her new business, and she became a born-again Christian. Everyone's story is different.

On the submissive's side every once and awhile I think of what happened to some ladies I got to know and enjoyed, but then I realize that mostly, it was long ago and far away. I remember on maxfisch.com a couple of years ago a longtime sub of Mistress Tess of NYC and who always posted about her there. He disappeared from the board and everyone wondered what happened to him. I don't remember the outcome. There has to be plenty of stories of subs who were regulars of Mistresses and disappeared. That had to be upsetting on a personal level to some Mistresses. Even though BDSM has been popularized in the past couple of decades, the many keep their kinks in the shadows and eventually, for their own reasons, disappear.

I served the same Mistress for about 10 years. She announced she was retiring. Then, it was a complete disappear. I understand. She didn't owe me anything. But, I've never been able to bond with another Mistress at an intimate level. I could have dropped off too. Life happens with all of us.

I applaud your candor. I would however point out that some of those Dommes still doing sessions in their sixties have financial reasons.

I don't know everyone's personal business. The ladies that I did and do know who session through their sixties were/are involved because they love it. They all did well for themselves and invested responsibly. I've seen a few doms make a brief attempt at coming out of retirement, only not to do so well and falling off the radar again. That makes me sad. It is an occupation that one must stay up on to work into the later years. As for me, I retired on the top of my game. I felt guilty about walking away from so much money, but for as much fun as I had, was ready to move on. It is different for everyone. I'm surprised by how many doms retire never to be heard from again.

Cheyenne-thank you for posting this topic. As a 'seasoned' Domme that has been around for decades, I have an insight into what may be perceived as 'retirement' if a Domme falls off the radar. Some Dommes that have been in business for many years have established a dedicated client base and no longer need to advertise or have a public presence. Personally, I'll occasionally pop up (on boards) to check in and see what is going on and just to say 'Hello'. I'm still busy without social media or extensive advertising. Eventually, clients will age-out or pass away and at that time a decision of retirement will have to be addressed. In the meantime, this Old Broad is still swinging the whip.

I would have liked keeping in touch with the dommes I saw for a long time. Nothing much or frequent but maybe a lunch once or twice a year? I don’t find it hard to transfer my “allegiance” to someone knew. I love dominant women in all their forms and variations. But then somebody spectacular again is a great joy!

Hello Lady!!

It is great to see you here. Thanks for the insight. It makes perfect sense that is the case for some of the ladies. It is great to hear you are still swinging a whip and having fun.

Cheyenne :-)