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Has anyone had an issue with this? I'm trying to see a new Domme next month. It has gotten a little off putting. Maybe she had a bad experience but she seems paranoid. I come with good references and a personal phone number. Assuming she has security cameras she could even get my plate number.

If you have concerns about the screening practices of a Mistress, as upsetting as it may seem, politely tell her you changed your mind and move on. From what you describe, she may have been stalked at some point or a friend/colleague was. Mistresses who read your post would likely have a far more accurate view than this old sub.

Looking back on ancient times (the '80s & '90s) I don't see how independent Mistresses who either rented space at a dungeon or did sessions out of their own apartments or rented spaces essentially gambled that they could figure our with a phone call or two if a prospective sub was legitimate, cop or axe murderer. At least today Mistresses can vet us a lot better, and vice versa.

I don't complain about prices or security measures. If they don't work out, I pass. In this case, I started to question her mental wellness. (Not to her, of course.) It left me wondering if stalking or harassing has become common place. I'm passing on this one and wish her the best.

I haven't noticed much of a difference. It is rare that I'm asked for references. I'm 90 minutes out of NYC. Maybe location is a factor.

Everyone should conduct business in a way that they are comfortable. That goes for prodoms and clients. She may have had a bad experience. It is difficult to tell. My experience as a very busy prodom is that most clients are very good people. My screening consisted of brief interviews and instinct. Treating a client like a potential criminal would have felt like throwing a wet blanket on a good time. There were two brushes, one of which was only on line, but nothing of any magnitude. But, I can understand if a dom has a single bad experience that she would be very cautious. My advise is that if you really want to see her, talk to her about it. If it doesn't work out, put it behind you. It sounds as if you have a lot of opportunity. Good luck with however you decide to proceed.

Thank you, Mistress. I'm feeling like taking a pass. I don't think any less of her. But, it isn't a good fit.

I've had a prodom ask for mine and my wife's identification to be sent on line. This was for a couple's session. We understood that is what makes her feel comfortable but it was a bridge too far for us. We've already been pushing it by having a custom built dungeon in our home. We live in a gated HOA and have to be careful with discretion in our town. If word got out, my clients either not care or think it was funny. My wife, however, has a high level job at a hospital. I don't blame the prodom for asking though. Everyone needs to be and feel safe. Good luck in what you decide.